I remember when I used to ask "does it ever get easier?? Does the pain of losing someone you have dreamed of your whole life ever gets easier?"- YES... Like a broken heart... the pain gets a little more barreble with each new day. You begin to finally see the "God has a purpose" and the "Everything happens for a reason" you heard so many times. Right after baby Harlow died, I hated those kind of comments... Days and nights so often blended together... I couldn't bring myself to look at her picture- my heart felt as it would never heal again. But it does... The heart is an amazing organ... the most amazing organ in your entire body as a matter of fact. It works 24/7... NO breaks... doesn't sit there and complain of its job as many of us do so often... and it heals in a incredible way. And so often the heart seems to get bigger... sometimes broken... but no matter what it goes through- it heals!- Over and over again. It has been seven months now since my baby girl has become an angel in Heaven. So much has changed and evolved in this past seven months... and I had to learn so many things in life and about myself... and I had to make some tough choices and changes... Looking at little babies sometimes still makes me sad... i still cry but with all I have learned my heart rejoices when I think I had the gift of being pregnant. It is a gift no one can ever take away from me- it is part of my history and it is part of me now... and I am incredibly lucky to have had an angel living in my tummy for 9 months :) I love looking at Harlow's picture now- in fact I keep one by my bed... something I couldn't do before... so I know now... the pain does get easier to deal with... and yes... your heart will heal too!!
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